MY NAME IS LEESA AND I HATE ORANGE

Posted: October 10, 2013 in Sports
Tags: , ,

RRR9

Ahhhhh…….the second week of October is upon us. The triple digit heat has departed and the cool mornings and nights are a welcome relief. Soon the green of the Tulsa trees will turn into the brilliant color of Autumn that we all love to admire. The spicy red, glowing yellow, and the chestnut brown leaves are a welcome sight after a long, sizzling hot Oklahoma summer. There are some leaves that are the color that is obtained by mixing red and yellow, but if you know me, you know those leaves are the ones I hope fall off the trees first.

It’s no secret how I feel about the color orange. I hate it. Every shade of it. And yes, my despise for the annoying hue of puke stems from the love of my beloved Sooners. Call it crazy, I don’t care. My name is Leesa, and I hate orange.

The second Saturday in October is now just 3 sleeps away at the time this is being written. My annual trek to Dallas for THE big game will commence Friday morning and as usual, I am so excited I can hardly contain myself. This is, however the weekend I will be subjected to having to view the worst possible shade of orange that could ever be. Texas Longhorn burnt orange.

Burnt orange. Why? Why would anyone love and admire this putrid color? I have had vomit that looks better than burnt orange. In fact, ALL the vomit I have ever produced is more attractive than burnt orange. What makes this shade of orange even worse is putting it on a bunch of big ass, slow learnin, football player wannabes and topping it off with a helmet donning a burnt orange reproductive system replica. Just thinking about it may very well cause me to vomit. And cramp.

Hook em Ovaries

Hook em Ovaries

Hopefully the game Saturday will be similar to the past 2 years. The Sooners were kicking Longhorn ass so badly that most of the Texas fans left beginning in the 3rd quarter. By the 4th, that side of the Cotton Bowl was almost completely emptied. The site of the steel grey bleachers was a hell of a lot better than the alternative. In fact, I began to wonder if someone in the Texas program was contemplating officially changing the team colors to grey and white. We couldn’t be so lucky. Oklahoma has outscored Texas 118- 38 the past 2 years. We only won by 8 the previous year.  In fact, they should just re-name this game the Crimson Red River Rivalry. Just my opinion, but it does have a nice sound to it.

Speaking of changes – Nike has released the Red River Rivalry uniforms made for both teams. As you can see golden touches have been added to the unis. On the upper right there is a patch with the Golden Hat – the trophy that goes to the winner of the annual shootout. On the upper left there’s the golden Nike swoosh – no shit, right? – and in the middle of the best team’s jersey there is a golden OU. The number on the jersey has been outlined in gold as well. I admit, I’m not a fan of the gold outline. The patches don’t bother me so much, but I just don’t like the golden outline. It seems so USCish to me. But it’s just for one game, and I don’t care what our guys wear as long as they are holding the gold Stetson at the end of the game.

newuni

Mack Brown is desperate to win this game. If he doesn’t he might want to find an alternate way back to Austin because he may be Kiffened off the team bus. That was somewhat sarcastic. I don’t really think he would be fired like that, I just wanted to use the term “Kiffened.” I don’t for one second believe Texas would fire him mid-season but if he loses to Bob Stoops again, he might as well climb in the trailer with Bevo because the shit storm he will be going home to will make riding home with Bevo seem like one of those damn Febreeze commercials.

As for my Sooners, I can’t wait to see them run out of that tunnel again Saturday onto the Cotton Bowl field and watch them raise the golden hat at the end of the game. I can’t wait to see Bob Stoops covered in icy cold Gatorade (hopefully red). I’m pretty sure the liquid on the Longhorns sideline won’t be cold because the guy who had the recipe for ice graduated.

 I know my beloved Sooners will be fired up despite losing one of our best defensive players for the season, Corey Nelson. From what I understand he postponed surgery so he can suit up and be on the sidelines to cheer his team on and be the great leader he is despite his injury. When the clock runs down, I hope to see Corey the first one with his hands on that hat made of gold.

goldenhat

So here we go, Sooner Nation. We are in the midst of Texas Hate Week and I can smell the sweet aroma of victory and Bevo burgers already.  Beat the Horns and we’re 6-0 and 3-0 in the Big XII. Beat the hell out of Texas! HORNS DOWN. BOOMER SOONER, ya’ll.

I HATE ORANGE. 

Even they know.

Even they know.

schooner

P.S. Sticking with the color theme, the Red Birds just knocked off the Pirates to advance to the NLCS as I was writing this. Way to go, Cardinals!!!!!logo4778029_lg

Follow me on Twitter: @soonerleesa

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Comments
  1. Christ, after reading that I need a smoke.

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